The slasher movie party cabin

[rorschach]

HA! See, to me DISTRICT 9 only really got it's action groove on in the last quarter of the movie, though I do agree that it does shift quite noticeably from a more sedentary meditation on alien/human relations to a more action oriented finale where everything that had been building just comes to a head.

From what I have been able to research, JENNIFER'S BODY actually commits the "unresolved issues" sin where things that have been built to be hugely important are just discarded casually and never brought up again when you expect they would come into play.

[Thomas Rigby]

You know, I might be unfairly biased when it comes to District 9 anyway, due to the fact that the day after I saw it I had a lengthy phone conversation with my idiot former friend (so don't ask why I still talk to him) who LOVES both Zombie Halloween flicks, the Transformers films, and a bunch of other tripe...and then listened to him say "yeah, man, when that guy was in the Robo-Mech suit, it was awesome!!!"

Which brought out a massive eyeroll from me. So I might dislike the movie just based on that alone. ;D

ADDED: Just saw the new sig, and Ha! My personal favorite Watchmen parody:

[rorschach]

Sept 19, 2009 16:58:41 GMT -5 Thomas Rigby said:

You know, I might be unfairly biased when it comes to District 9 anyway, due to the fact that the day after I saw it I had a lengthy phone conversation with my idiot former friend (so don't ask why I still talk to him) who LOVES both Zombie Halloween flicks, the Transformers films, and a bunch of other tripe...and then listened to him say "yeah, man, when that guy was in the Robo-Mech suit, it was awesome!!!"

Which brought out a massive eyeroll from me. So I might dislike the movie just based on that alone. ;D

ADDED: Just saw the new sig, and Ha! My personal favorite Watchmen parody:

I love that parody too...but I was trying to find something that I hadn't used before, hence the 'Watch-Peanuts".

As for DISTRICT 9, I have a few friends that bitched about how the ONLY good part of the movie was when Wikus got in that suit. I also did an eyeroll, because to me, though that might be the most exciting part, it is also the structurally weakest part of the movie, the part where the writers just turned everything off and said, "Let's send the audience out with a bang!" much like ending a five star classic mat wrestling clinic between Bret Hart and CM Punk with an elaborate dive off of the upper balcony through three flaming tables. You sense they had a very majestic ending, but felt that they needed the action punch in order to justify the preceding buildup.

Those same friends complained loudly whenever GAMER shifted gears too. They totally missed the point that Nevaldine/Taylor were making with that movie, and instead just lapped up the gore and violence just like the mindless drones Nevaldine/Taylor were spoofing in the film! THAT got a sad head shake from me, since GAMER is NOT that complex of a movie, it really isnt; if anything they put all their cards on the table for all to see. How anyone could miss such an obvious point as that film makes, I don't know, unless Michael Bay and reality TV have fried far more of our brains that I had previously considered.

[Thomas Rigby]

Went and checked out Gamer, eh? You, good sir, have far more courage than I.

[rorschach]

Sept 20, 2009 8:43:02 GMT -5 Thomas Rigby said:

Went and checked out Gamer, eh? You, good sir, have far more courage than I.

Ehhh....once I found out it was Neveldine/Taylor (who haven't done wrong by me yet) I was much more ready to go and see it. Plus, it has some decent actors in it, so there was that. It's honestly not as bad as you might think. It's kind of a digital age GLADIATOR, in a way, though much less serious, and much less, well, good than that film.

[Some kind of a DSR-type person]

Sept 21, 2009 2:59:44 GMT -5 rorschach said:

Sept 20, 2009 8:43:02 GMT -5 Thomas Rigby said:

Went and checked out Gamer, eh? You, good sir, have far more courage than I.

Ehhh....once I found out it was Neveldine/Taylor (who haven't done wrong by me yet) I was much more ready to go and see it. Plus, it has some decent actors in it, so there was that. It's honestly not as bad as you might think. It's kind of a digital age GLADIATOR, in a way, though much less serious, and much less, well, good than that film.

I got a distinct Running Man vibe from the trailers, and Running Man was a fun though ludicrously corny film. I'd be willing to see it, but no one I know wants to, so I'ma have to wait 'til DVD.

[rorschach]

There is a bit of RUNNING MAN in there too. In fact there's a whole lot that's inspired by that movie. The nefarious gamesmaster (played by DEXTER's Micheal C. Hall), the game where you literally bet your life....and even a woman in a sexy outfit in peril, not to mention the overarching theme of a society so corrupted and complacent and overfed on violence that they'll gladly watch another human die.

[rorschach]

Don't get excited though....if there's one thing PD knows how to do i's an amazing trailer for a CRAP film.

Still holding out hope my boy Jackie Earle can save this.

[Shovelman]

I think it might look OK, but I don't like Freddie's new voice. It sounds he put some marbles in his mouth

[Thomas Rigby]

I have no problem whatsoever with whatever story changes they decide to make with Nightmare on Elm Street. I've remained consistent on this for a long time and take heat for it (also all the time), but if there's one horror franchise that DESPERATELY needs some new life breathed into its tired formula, it's Nightmare.

The only problem with this, and the teaser trailer, is that the kids in the movie look like just as vanilla of a bunch that we saw in the TCM and Friday the 13th remakes, and the overall tone of the whole thing seems to be just as faux-hipster as the other PD remakes. That's all for now, maybe I'll have more later.

[Thomas Rigby]

Also, ever get around to watching Jennifer's Body, Rorschach? Either you haven't, or you have, hated it, and dont' want to hurt my feelings. ;D

Time for a little TR Halloween Release Season 2007 Report (cue 2001 theme)...

This isn't news to anyone who has posted regularly in these threads, but TR's least favorite subgenre of horror film is the zombie movie. I don't like Romero's Dead movies. At all. I've never seen the charms of the Evil Dead series, and even Peter Jackson's Dead Alive is a movie that left me feeling rather cold.

But allow me to focus on the Romero films for a moment (or at least the Romero films that I'm familiar with, which goes up to and includes Land of the Dead). I enjoy the original Night of the Living Dead, but when it comes to the other zombie flicks I've seen, the defining characteristic that sticks out in my mind is the oft-repeated moral that the human beings in the film COULD survive the ordeal if they would just stop bitching at each other. Eventually, one or more of the party of surviving humans does something that royally screws the other characters over, causing a catastrophic chain of events that lead to the human characters being taught a lesson the hard way. Namely, winding up as zombie food.

To put it bluntly, I've always found this convention (that many zombie film-makers and writers alike seem to have a massive hard-on for) to be EXTREMELY contrived and unbelievable, existing only for the sake of the writer of the movie making some deep, and often didactic, point about humanity as a whole. Maybe this is just me, but watching these movies as a kid, I always thought that if a zombie apocalypse were to actually happen, every other human being that I saw would instantly become my new best friend, and that surviving humans would band together for the common goal of survival as opposed to the cutthroat nature of the Romero depresso-fests. Indeed, it seems as if the characters in Romero's universe are concocting ways to screw each other before even meeting up.

But you know what? Scratch all of the above, because it's way more thought than should really be put into Zombieland, my new favorite zombie movie of all time. Yup, Zombieland scores the clean pinfall win over Return of the Living Dead Part II, featuring even more fun, humor, and genuinely likable characters than the goofy 1988 film that I watched and enjoyed so much on MonsterVision back in the day.

This is a movie where virtually everything fires on all cylinders; director Ruben Fleischer and writers Rhett Rheese and Paul Wernick sought to create a movie that sent up the conventions of the zombie film without outright mocking them, provide a genuinely engaging human story with its charismatic four central characters, and knock your balls off with its quirky, offbeat sense of humor. Having just exited the theater two hours ago, I can safely report mission accomplished on all counts.

The first character we meet is Columbus (Jesse Eisenburg), a college student who has concocted a meticulously detailed list of survival rules in Zombieland. Just like in the movies, a virus has spread among the population, and also just like in the movies, the virus spreads by zombie bites. Columbus always plays it safe; he begins the movie with four central rules ("Cardio," "Double Tap," "Beware Restrooms," and "Seatbelts"), and in the electrifying and hilarious opening sequence, we see examples of every rule in action.

While traveling the American countryside, Columbus (named after his hometown, as all four protagonists in this film are) meets up with Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson), redneck zombie slayer who doesn't give a damn. While Columbus is a wussy scaredy-cat, Tallahassee is a reckless thrillseeker. The character is perhaps the most ingenious thing about Zombieland; he seems to enjoy the post-apocalyptic wasteland of America with the exuberance of a 10-year-old kid, and views zombie killing as an art form. In addition, his entire life is now about the pursuit of Twinkies. Because, in his own words, "in case you didn't know, Twinkies do have an expiration date!"

Conflict arises when two sisters, college-age Wichita (Emma Stone) and 12-year-old Little Rock (Abigail Breslin) con our heroes on two separate occasions. But while the two duos are mighty chilly toward each other in the beginning, this movie shows its true greatness - and originality within the confines of the zombie genre. Again, maybe I haven't seen many zombie movies, but I cannot overstate just how refreshing it is to see characters in a zombie movie actually working out their differences, cracking jokes, and eventually learning to get along. Compared to the countless numbskulls in Romero's one-note series attempting to either (a) convince all of the other characters that they, and they alone, know the solution to the current problem and that everyone else is an idiot, or (b) shamelessly trying to profit from the chaos, the flawed heroes of Zombieland endeared themselves to me on a first-name basis on the merit of NOT being Romero-like.

What's more, while this movie is comedy-focused through and through, the characters actually go through ARCS, instead of being douches who repeatedly make the same mistakes over and over again like the automotons that I'm used to in movies of this nature.
But I'm probably getting ahead of myself again. Truth be told, this is just a phenomenally entertaining movie from start to finish. While I probably SHOULD have known that my favorite scene in the film was coming, I'm not quite the upcoming movie monkey I used to be; thus, when the characters reach Los Angeles and decide to crash at a celebrity's mansion for a night, the destination that Tallahassee chooses was a total surprise to me. Not to mention that I got to spend 10 minutes with my favorite comedic actor of all time (playing himself, no less).

While Eisenburg, Stone, and Breslin are all very well-suited to their roles and blend in seamlessly with their simple but well-played characterizations, this movie belongs to Harrelson, plain and simple. Woody was the star of my #2 film of all time (Kingpin) and a longtime favorite of mine dating back to my childhood spent watching White Men Can't Jump and Cheers reruns. And after a kickass supporting role in No Country for Old Men, it's official - he's back as an A-list star. His portrayal of Tallahassee is a performance that literally makes you grin every time he shows up on screen; whether he's telling Eisenburg to nut op or shut up or debating the logistics of Hannah Montana with Breslin, this is one of the most entertaining film characters I have seen in a long time.

See this movie in a theater, if at all possible - my theater was pretty damn full, and in a packed house, this movie is a damn fun time. Perhaps the best endorsement that I can give this movie is that I didn't even FEEL tired sitting through this one, as we're rapidly approaching hour #22 of sleep deprivation, as per usual for Friday. Honestly, this movie was so good that I temporarily forgot my own fatigue.

**** out of ****, and Joe Bob says check it out.

[rorschach]

TR,

While I disagree with you on the points of the Romero movies ( I love em, and can acknowledge their faults but I don't think the characters are QUITE as bad as you say they are) I must say that your review REALLY makes me want to go see Zombieland. Alas, JENNIFER'S BODY left theaters before I had the cash to go and see it. Will have to catch it either on DVD or at a dollar theater.

That being said, I have to point out that I don't think it's necessarily the Romero zombie films that drove the concept of "bickering survivors vs. undead masses" into the ground as far as turning it into a cliche'....it's the hundreds of poor imitators that have arrived since Romero's original that have done that (it feels like there were a hundred zombie films in the last year alone!). It's as if they feel like it's disrespecting the master's work to have it otherwise. Heck, it's really not something ZOMBIE films have a monopoly on either....THE MIST and countless other catastrophe films also work this same theme.

[Thomas Rigby]

Yeah, I don't know what it is, but zombies are rapidly becoming to the modern horror film what masked killers were in the early '80s, and what J-horror ghost-type characters were a few years ago...extremely overplayed. We've even got a World War Z movie coming out sooner or later.

Hence why Zombieland was a giant breath of fresh air. While I didn't mention it in my review, it's not just my favorite zombie movie ever, but my #1 FILM of 2009 (yes, even better than Up). Thus far, of course.

Agreed much on the points about other catastrophe movies, as well. When I first saw The Mist my initial reaction was that it was a massive ripoff of virtually EVERYTHING that Romero did in 1968 with the original Living Dead, and your opinion confirms that.

[rorschach]

Speaking of which, when was the last time (prior to ZOMBIELAND) that you could actually say that you liked each and every last member of a group in a horror film? I mean, anymore, they're usually ALL vaguely hateable twenty-somethings/teens that you so dislike that you end up rooting for the killer!

NEWSFLASH: I am not supposed to root for Freddy the charred child-molester! He is THE VILLAIN! But when you make his targets so god damned irritating and unlikeable, that's exactly what happens!

[Thomas Rigby]

Hmmm, that's a good question...the most recent example that I can think of is the Grudge series, in both the American and Japanese incantations, as hooking you emotionally is one of the many things that the series does really well. Most horror movies nowadays do the "bad things happening to bad people" aspect ad nauseum, as you said, but there's plenty of perfectly normal and engaging characters incurring Kayako's wrath in the Ju-On/Grudge flicks. I can't really think of any disposable douchebag characters in those films.

[Deadpool is Insane]

Zombieland was fraggin' awesome.

Though I think I'm gonna murder TR for daring to diss my beloved ...of the Dead series.

[Thomas Rigby]

Oct 3, 2009 19:04:31 GMT -5 Deadpool is Insane said:

Zombieland was fraggin' awesome.

Though I think I'm gonna murder TR for daring to diss my beloved ...of the Dead series.

Murder all you want, Pool Man, I'm just happy that over here people (and by people I mean all two of you ;D) are actually responding to my review.

As for Romero's series, hey, everyone else likes them but me. On the flip side of the coin, there's comparatively few people who love the Ju-On/Grudge movies (my own personal favorite movie series) as much as I do.

[rorschach]

Oct 3, 2009 14:02:12 GMT -5 Thomas Rigby said:

Hmmm, that's a good question...the most recent example that I can think of is the Grudge series, in both the American and Japanese incantations, as hooking you emotionally is one of the many things that the series does really well. Most horror movies nowadays do the "bad things happening to bad people" aspect ad nauseum, as you said, but there's plenty of perfectly normal and engaging characters incurring Kayako's wrath in the Ju-On/Grudge flicks. I can't really think of any disposable douchebag characters in those films.

The JU ON films, yes. The GRUDGE films, not so much. People go into that house, they get what they deserve. What could be easier than steering clear of the "death house"? ;D

[Thomas Rigby]

Oct 3, 2009 23:32:43 GMT -5 rorschach said:

Oct 3, 2009 14:02:12 GMT -5 Thomas Rigby said:

Hmmm, that's a good question...the most recent example that I can think of is the Grudge series, in both the American and Japanese incantations, as hooking you emotionally is one of the many things that the series does really well. Most horror movies nowadays do the "bad things happening to bad people" aspect ad nauseum, as you said, but there's plenty of perfectly normal and engaging characters incurring Kayako's wrath in the Ju-On/Grudge flicks. I can't really think of any disposable douchebag characters in those films.

The JU ON films, yes. The GRUDGE films, not so much. People go into that house, they get what they deserve. What could be easier than steering clear of the "death house"? ;D

Well, I'm about to get really nerdy into the inner-goings of the Ju-On/Grudge films, but since we're both huge fans I don't think you'll mind.

I DO agree with you that the characters are handled a bit better in the Japanese films, but, IMO, this is mainly due to the rules of the series being slightly different in the Japanese and American versions of the story. In the Ju-On films, ALL bets were off, and characters didn't necessarily have to enter THE HOUSE to get Kayako and Toshio after them. Indeed, in the Japanese films, Kayako is a little like Michael Myers; sometimes her victims have done absolutely nothing to her other than just get in her way, or simply be in the wrong place at the wrong time. The security guard who searches the bathroom in Ju-On: The Grudge dies, as do Izumi's friends in Ju-On 2, who never set foot in the house (and Kayako f***s with one of those characters' heads like no other). Indeed, it seems that all you have to do is KNOW a victim to gain the curse in the Japanese films, leading to a lot of perfectly ordinary and perfectly innocent victims biting it.

On the DVD commentary of The Grudge (the American one), however, Shimizu says that he wanted to establish a hard-and-fast rule for the American film that characters had to enter the house to get the curse, as he didn't believe that American audiences would accept so much randomness. Thus, that very same security guard in The Grudge survives the tribute scene in the remake, and writer Stephen Susco is forced to come up with ways for all of the characters to set foot in the Saeki house.

Still, I think that the only characters in the American series who WERE playing with fire and might have deserved their fates are the two "mean girls" at the beginning of The Grudge 2, who trick Arielle Kebbel into entering the house with them in order to prank her. But Kebbel? Innocent, as she just wanted to fit in with the popular girls. Sarah Michelle Gellar, just as her Japanese counterpart Rika did before her, only went to the house because of her job; Amber Tamblyn is only trying to find out what happened to her sister; and the main characters in the third film live in the goddamned apartment building where the ghosts now roam.

All of this just to say that while I don't think the American movies are quite as good, they still do a very good job engendering sympathy for their victims. And there's my nerdiest post of the year, 'Schach.

[thelesserevil]

I saw Zombieland last night, I thought it was awesome and one of the best zombie movies I've ever seen, and Woody was awesome.


on a unrelated note I made this quiz on sporcle and no one has played it

www.sporcle.com/games/OctoKing/puppetmaster_puppets

some one please play it